It;s early and my house is so quiet. The kids are still sleeping and I am trying to write quickly before they wake up. If you haven’t noticed yet, I haven’t been writing every day. It was my intention and I think it is good to have goals but I haven’t exactly achieved that one. Per my post about reading “The Happiness Project” well…..I haven’t done that either. I did check it out of the library and I actually read the forward but that was as far as I got. I have started 3 new songs but haven’t finished those either. The ideas are still there but I can’t remember much beyond that. I always had this theory that if the song were any good I would just remember it right? I think at this stage, counting on my memory is a bit crazy.
So what now. My constant self examination has led me to this thought. Why do I get half way down the road and turn back? It is strange how even the tiniest events (and the big ones too) support this. I don’t know if you read my post a few days back where I mentioned that I was going into pre production for one of the songs…..well that never happened. Our car wasn’t working and I had to cancel. I know that seems random and out of my control but it is hard to ignore the timing. I have also been sick and it just seems to be lingering around, can’t shake it. Oddly enough my illness has had me coughing for about 3 weeks now and that makes it hard to sing. It has gotten much much better but it just won’t leave completely. I feel like my psyche is working against me. I am putting up road blocks to actually getting somewhere with this project. I’m going to work on that, and while I am at it I will work on some of those songs as well. Maybe instead of “road blocks” they are only detours that are meant to take me down a different path. ” Yea, that’s the ticket…detours.” That is how I am going to try and look at it from now on. New path= new discoveries. That’s not bad right?