You’ll have to excuse me while I pat myself on the back. I took a big step today toward, what I think is a really concrete effort, to actually getting this thing done. I asked for help. Yea me! I didn’t stop to think about what someone might think of me (“she’s crazy”) or if they would even want to help….I just asked. I don’t like being needy as much as I don’t like going to the dentist. I have had to be in sooooo many ways and it makes me feel a little sick. When I have had to ask for help, be it financial (which most of the time it is) or time oriented, it has resulted in lots of tears and time spent in bed. “Why can’t I just take care of myself” or better yet “when will I be in the position to help someone else.” I feel like I am always on the receiving end and I HATE that. But this time……I see it as a means to an end and actually saw that maybe the person I asked was waiting for me to do so.
What this all really boils down to is that I feel like this project needs to see the light of day and I will do anything to make it happen. I am not letting myself get stuck in my usual fears and excuses. Don’t get me wrong… I still go there but the difference is that I just don’t stay there.
So what does this mean, if anything, to you? Well I am committing myself to doing a small backyard concert at my home before the summer is over. I can showcase some new things and maybe even sing a few of the older songs that I haven’t done for some time. Who knows, I might even throw in a cover or two. I thought it might actually be a good way to get people interested in this new project and maybe even raise some funds to get it done! Stay tuned!