Don’t stop Believing

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Today I am weary.   Living in ones own head can really wear a person out.   I would describe myself as creative, passionate and sometimes even dynamic……  and then I start second guessing myself.   I try to make decisions in spite of my fear and do what I think is right and then spend the rest of the time wondering if it was.   I try to follow my heart but tend to give in at the first sign of anyone’s hesitation.   I have decided this time to stick with it ….or maybe not.  Maybe my fear is well founded and I should listen to that cautious voice in the back of my head…….I think I am going a bit mad.

Time is not my friend.   I am much better at diving in and going for it.  If given time to ponder I worry myself into a state of inactivity.   I have always thought it best to just dive into the pool no matter how cold you think the water might be.   Getting in a little at a time is too painful.   Go for the gusto right?   My brother always says “sometimes it’s easier to get forgiveness than permission.” I think he is right about that.   People are quick to forgive a mistake or a decision made in haste but they won’t always get behind an idea that is out of their comfort zone.  It’s easy to say that it wont work rather than take a risk.

I try really hard to be in touch with the  Spirit and   I believe in miracles and signs even when the rest of the world doesn’t.   I have had too many miracles in my own life to not believe that they happen everyday.

So for now I will trudge through and keep moving forward and try not to think about it too much.   God is good all the time!  even if we don’t always think so.

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